It’s time to ditch your New Year’s resolutions.
Stop kidding yourself; you won’t stick to them anyway.
What is it about this time of year well we feel we should be making unrealistic declarations to ourselves?
How many New Year’s Eve’s have you promised you will; lose weight, watch less TV, drink less wine, give up chocolate, basically everything you love in life and then take up yoga, running, kale, or anything else you hate (Sorry all you yoga lovers…but really!!)?
Well, to hell with that, I love chocolate, I love cake, and I love vegging out in front of Netflix.
Let’s call an end to this annual New Year tradition of trying to con yourself into being this ‘better you’, then beating yourself up for not becoming it.
Why don’t New Year’s resolutions work and why do they end up becoming nothing more than a set of well-intentioned but meaningless goals that are all but forgotten by the second, (OK, first), week of January?
They rarely stick because they focus on what you think you should do, what others think you should do, or what the media tells you to do or who you should be.
The last New Year’s Resolution I made was to ‘never make another one’. It’s the only one I have ever kept.
I’ve come up with something better. It’s more fun, more relatable and definitely more enjoyable than yoga and far tastier than kale!
It’s called a Personal Manifesto.
Creating your Personal Manifesto is wildly different than thinking through a few ‘I should’s”.
For a start, it has nothing to do with the time of year or giving up specific acts. I told you I love chocolate.
The ‘Personal Manifesto’ that I help others create is about asking the big questions in life, ‘Who are you?’, ‘How you want to show up in your world?’, and ‘Why you want to make a difference?’.
It sounds a little heavy, and it should scare you a bit because then you know you are on the right path.
Writing one takes time, work, courage and brutal honesty. It is not composed in 20 minutes.
To do a Personal Manifesto that has meaning, you need to be thoroughly open, vulnerable, but also bold. There is also no room for being coy or humble.
This is a document you want to live by, so open your heart and mind and share your deepest desires.
To be honest, this is a lot easier said than done so I suggest brainstorming it with another person, someone who can tease the right questions from you.
A Personal Manifesto is a powerful tool that I use with many of my regular clients but also with people who come to me for a ‘one off’ laser focused ‘let’s sort this s*** out’ session.
It’s a real game-changer and leads to many an insight or ‘Aha” moment.
It will help you focus on your true desires, strengths and values.
It a declaration of how you will walk out into your world every day and say, ‘This is me’.
I like people to challenge their inner critical voices, their Saboteurs.
If your inner Judge whispers in your ear that you are not good enough, smart enough or brave enough, then write ‘I am bold and brave, even when I am scared’.
Putting fearless statements out into the world is the first step to making them true.
I encourage you to make all of your statements bold. They don’t even all have to be true. They can become true when you have spoken them into the world.
Your words transform how you see your world, and therefore they create your world.
This, my friend, is the world you will ultimately live in.
The power of The Personal Manifesto is that it behaves as if all of that magic is happening right now.
So let’s make 2021 a little bit different. We need that now more than ever.
Behave like a designer and create your life.
Don’t settle for an ‘off the peg’, GAP kind of life, reach for a one of a kind, designed just for you, future.
So how do you decide what to put on your Manifesto?
I have suggested you make them all bold, but the first must be the most fierce. You may not read all of them every day, so make the top one, the one you will naturally take note of big and all-encompassing.
Mine is; I have conversations that change peoples lives, and it’s f***ing awesome.
This speaks to more than being a coach it says I will listen deeply to everyone in my life.
What are some things you will not compromise? Put them on your list.
I am comfortable with vulnerability.
I am true to my word.
What are some things you want to feel? Put them on too.
I love my body.
I am enough.
Don’t be too serious.
I create space for fun and joy every day.
I don’t take myself too seriously.
What scares you?
I am comfortable in every social situation.
I am a confident public speaker.
Remember I said, they don’t have to be true yet, they can become true when they are spoken into the world enough times.
Having a Personal Manifesto will help you when you have major decisions to make or a crossroads in your life or having a difficult or stressful time. Reading who you are, why you act and what you want helps focus your mind. It helps you see what’s really important to you.
Your Manifesto can and should evolve over time. It’s fun to keep the old version as it helps to see your growth.
Writing it is only the first step; you have to live it too.
Read it regularly, say it aloud, make it part of who you really are.
The session was fantastic. I’ve written down my manifesto and having it visible, especially with profanity, makes it all the more visible to me every morning. It’s like keeping a string around my finger.
